It's been really a while since I post something on my first ever blog, and I owe it to you readers (LOL, cracked on that as I don't have any) but just the same, I like reading what I have been through or what I have been feeling before so here it is.
General I am HAPPY.
Although, I might have shed some tears earlier - I think I'm still happy. And I'm loving this feeling - hope this feeling stays forever :)
These past month have been liberating and although I might have lost my job, that I had for 5 years, I quickly got over it easily. After the notice, I have gained a whole lotta great friends, I've been raving about this whoever asks me. They were the hidden gems that was out there in the open and waiting to be uncovered but dunno maybe I'm too fixated on the current that I don't notice them. But whoa, after I unearthed them - it was a great feeling, that you can be true and you and that more people can understand you and you can share with them as well. I might have difficulty explaining it all, but really the feeling was grand. More than a lottery price.
And the feeling that you have destroyed the wall that's been blocking you to see more great things beyond what is actually there on your vision. The feeling that you are extending your horizon to a much more, to much farther level to the distance that you were afraid to take before. And now you are experiencing bliss because you took that step and the brave you persevere.
I have never been a risk taker, all my life I was always on the safe side. Waiting for whatever may happen and for some time this was the case until I fully lived up to my capabilities that, again I have never explored I can do. And analysts might say that it might seem to late, but none I think could easily validate or say that's it's just right, that it's in time. :)
and another story is to face the ghost that I created, it was the bravest that I've done and to really set aside what's been restricting us to fully and freely connect. You know at times, you can really try hard, and use all your resources but if you have not put your guard down, and listen and understand you will never establish a perfect connection. But I did all that, and since then it was a breath of fresh air, it was easier, it was beautiful and lovely, there's an actual connection. And again I love it.
It was the best days of my life..Thanks God talga!
I am not promising nor will I ever carve this on a stone but I will try my best to stay because I am happy, genuinely happy and again I love this. Thanks to these opportunity, I was afraid before that I can never achieve this but I am....and unsure of where this will lead me, my thought will always hope for a bright future, I'd love that but it will take a while and that it might not happen, hopefully it will but again I'm at a place where I'm kinda contented, but if this goes up to another level that will be super great. So there..this might be cryptic but this is me and my war.
I love this, I'm happy :)
